Is a story beginning again!!!

sari raat ek dard sa raha hai is seene me……
ek chahat……
jaise kuch kehna ho tumse……
magar tu mere sath nahi hai……
jab tu hoti hai ……
to ye chahat is dar se shant ho jati hai……
ki kahi ye adhuri na reh jaye……
mai samajh nahi pa raha hu……
ki ise shant karu ya badhne du……
is baat ka izhar karu ya rehne du……
kuch aur intezar karu ya keh du……
khud se poochhu to koi jawaab nahi……
khuda se poochhu hu to koi jawaab nahi……
kiska intezar hai mujhe……
kya dhundh raha hu……
kya galat hai kya sahi……
in sawaalon ka koi jawaab nahi……
tu meri zindagi me khwab ban ke ayi hai……
shayad mere saare sawaalo ka jawaab ban ke ayi hai……
magar ye bhi ek sachchai hai……
ki ab tuta to ye dil kabhi jud nahi paega……
ab tak samhala hai……bikhar jaega……
tu chali gai to……
ye banda jee nahi payega…
mar jaega.

The Story Began--2

Seating arrangement used to be gender wise in the class, not because it was in the discipline chart but due to conformity. Out of nowhere she sat beside him that day…’not a big deal…it’ll be the first and the last day’…he thought. But she was up to something…she stayed…they became friends…another story began. She was chubby and peppy while he…lean and shy. She was cute and chatty…hmmm he was also cute but silent. Her frisky feature fascinated him. His sensible style stimulated her. At times she was lovely and her sparkling smile created waves inside him but he never realized the intensity. It was only when she didn’t come to school one day…the next day…the day after…for the whole week…it seemed like a hundred years to him and he realized it was not just friendship. He got worried…what will happen if she will also leave him and go away…or ‘Has she already gone?’ this mere thought was appalling. What is all this…he can’t let this happen again…he won’t be able to survive the stroke this time…but he is missing her gravely…life was so colorful when she was around and all of a sudden it had become pale…her presence made everything so interesting…even the most irksome subject would turn into a thrilling movie and now its just the other way round…’where is she…what happened…I need her…please come back.’

Finally she came…oh what a sigh of relief…its that feeling again…but he ignored her…as if he didn’t remember her anymore…he was afraid that she would get upset…its been so long and he didn’t say a word to her…not even a simple HI…didn’t ask her the reason of her absence…wasn’t he curious?...did he at all care for her?...didn’t he miss her?...is it that she was important only when she made him laugh and now when she is in some trouble she means nothing? But his intentions were not to hurt her…instead he didn’t want his feelings to fly again because the feathers(she) might leave him one day…leave him forever…leave him alone…and these feelings of his…which are so curious to fly today may crash…hard on to the ground…and may never be able to fly again. She didn’t notice the whirlwind of his mind…in fact she acted in a similar manner…she sat beside a girl…didn’t say a word to him…hardly looked at him…didn’t pay any attention towards him. Now…all he thought would be disturbing her because of his reaction were actually annoying him vice versa…’ why is she not talking to me?...shouldn’t she tell me the reason of her absence?…didn’t she miss me?...am I not her friend anymore? She seems happy among her friends and doesn’t need me. Is it over…or never started?

This went on and never changed…there were hundreds and thousands of questions which kept on exhausting his nerves everyday but he could not ask her now as it was too late…and one day she left school…leaving all such questions unanswered. ‘It is late now…I should have talked to her when she was around. Parting would have been much easier.’ thought the stupid boy. All alone again…with a moral…so painful that he would better cut his own throat. I better not elaborate on his condition much because it was obviously pathetic I better tell you how he recovered. The only thought which comforted him was that she also had the same feeling for him but since she knew she was going to leave him she decided not to continue it further and it was a matter of only a month and a half...

The Story Began--1

It was a November evening…silence was listening to the quiet sound of stagnance when the air started whistling, moon was somnolent and stars lethargic…he heard something…its that feeling, she is out there playing with her frenz. He was dying to go out…to see her, suddenly there was a power cut and the story began. He quickly searched for his slippers in the candle light and opened the door…darkness was never so scintillating. He wanted to make his feelings discernible yet nonchalant so he peeped through the side eye…sitting on the gate pillar. Very soon she discovered the incoming…it was true and she could not resist herself falling for it…because she was also diseased. He could feel her…he could breathe her…eyes engaged…heartbeat harmonized…and…she smiled…the boy was blessed with love…maiden…pure. They were walking…their souls flying, their steps were slow but their thoughts…racing…through time to the end of their days…dreaming each moment to be lived in each other’s eyes.

Life onwards was paradise…each glimpse a moment of celebration…smallest conversation was the sound of music…her love was his life. At such tender age with such intense feelings it was always going to be disastrous. One day she was gone…without saying a word…his pulse ceased…strength shattered…innocence bruised…and the hero inside…died. But somehow he survived the cataclysm and emerged out with injured emotions. Sorrow had nurtured him more humane but his soul was lonely...